I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
