Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
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