the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
