The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
The Olympian is in my bed
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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