3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Randomize
