shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
