Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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