Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
