...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I am never drinking with the goths again.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
