do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
