So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
