I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
