And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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