They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
