I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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