Sry I called you an 8
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
