I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
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