I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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