Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
