im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
