Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
