doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
