So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
