On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
