The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
We're too hungover to prance.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
