Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
it's great music for shaving your balls
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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