On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
