I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
