Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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