My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
