things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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