I'm jealous of your bromance
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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