i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I woke up under a house in Key West
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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