sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
