I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
