the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
