God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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