Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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