omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Randomize
