So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
