Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
