guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
