I forgot how hot balto sounded
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
We are two peas in an std pod
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
