You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
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