that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
