When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
