no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
please come you make the beer taste better
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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