i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
