u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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