Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
this will be a night to untag.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
